There are certain emotions deep inside of the human spirit that causes us to smile, to laugh, to experience joy but have you ever wonder why people smile? Maybe you’ve never asked yourself this question but tonight, as i wait for my delayed flight at the Chicago - O'Hare Airport, i feel like searching for the meaning of why we smile. Sounds crazy, right!?
What’s the origin of a smile?
Where does it come from?
is it from feeling happy?
is it from moments that make us feel alive?
perhaps from a funny joke that we hear?
i don’t really know.
i like to smile and be happy but sometimes it’s such a hard thing to do.
if i can be honest with you, i really don’t feel like smiling at all at this exact moment.
i don’t feel like being with people because i know that if i’m around others i will do my best to pretend to smile
and pretending doesn’t feel good does it?
i wanna be alone. i wanna be silent. i wanna get away from everyone.
i know it’s a very dark thing to write about but tonight i am feeling like being completely vulnerable.
i don’t care if it makes sense or if anyone out there reads this blog. i just wanna get this off my chest.
My life is in a weird place right now because i have no idea what is going on or where i’m headed towards.
i had a whole different plan, a different idea of what i was going to be doing at this age, but it didn’t go as expected.
i’ve made a lot of mistakes, i’ve made a lot of bad decisions throughout my life and now i have no choice other than to learn to live with the scars of the past and face my today hoping not to make the same mistakes that i made yesterday.
i don’t wanna keep destroying myself emotionally, spiritually, or physically.
i wanna find peace and contentment,
i wanna find the meaning of what it means to be alive and what being fully present looks like.
i spend too much time thinking about these things and having little luck with finding the answers.
i wanna find joy. i wanna find true love. i wanna find the answers to life’s biggest questions.
i googled the definition of the word “simile” and here is what i found,
“smile: form one’s features into a pleased, kind, or amused expression, typically with the corners of the mouth turned up and the front teeth exposed.”
Ok, cool. but…
a definition doesn’t really answer my question of what does it mean when we smile?
or what causes us to smile?
i guess some things are just not meant to be defined but instead they are meant to be experienced.
here’s the thing, i personally believe that smiling is an art form.
i think that just like how we create music with sounds and rhythms
smiles can be born out of joy, pain, love, brokenness, and confusion.
just like the painter creates beautiful art with a mixture of colors,
smiles can be created from a mixture of feelings.
sometimes it’s easy to smile, it comes out naturally,
you don’t have to force yourself at all, you just smile without thinking about it.
other times, we have to fake a smile, we force ourselves to laugh.
it’s either pretending or being in a very awkward situation, right?
i am learning that sometimes beautifully honest art comes from the worse moments,
that the best songs come from hearts thatare miserably broken.
Maybe we can approach smiling the same way?
what if i make the conscious decision of smiling even when things are not how i want them to be?
i know it’s not easy, but is it doable?
Here are some reasons of why i should have a big smile on my face (even when life sucks):
i have health.
i have a roof over my head.
i have a bed.
i have a family that loves me.
i have food to eat.
How awesome is that!!?
Those reasons are enough to smile for the rest of my life!
but how do i remember it when things don’t feel right?
maybe through waking up and saying a prayer of thankfulness?
perhaps sending a random text message to someone i love?
maybe smiling can become form of prayer, a worship hymn to the creator, or a painful lamentation.
Smiles are contagious and have the power to bring hope into our restless hearts.
i will keep on practicing the art of a smiling even when the skies are gray,
i will find it’s magic by doing what brings me joy.
i will discover it’s secrets by making someone else smile.
i guess that’s all i have to say for now..
smile, you fools!